ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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