we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
