The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
