i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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