he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
