Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(418): View more from Quebec

I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate

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(517): View more from Michigan

Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.

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(+44): View more from England

His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...

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(513): View more from Ohio

My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.

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(510): View more from California

Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay

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(224): View more from Illinois

you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney

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(281): View more from Texas

and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?

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(706): View more from Georgia

My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

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