Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I have aggressive nipples.
Randomize
