I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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