his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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