the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
