Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
