Me too!
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
