Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
