Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
