You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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