You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
