on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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