Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
pray to the hookup gods
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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