Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
