I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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