before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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