I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
