I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
