Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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