also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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