is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
