Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
