problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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