I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
