alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
You may now shotgun with the bride
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
