Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
