i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
