i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
You pole danced in your parka.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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