Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
