Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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