You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
