I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
