Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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