Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
