we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
