so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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