whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I came so hard my ears popped.
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