the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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