Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
