I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Vodka?
Forever.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
