oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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