Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I think people are normalizing furries
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
