This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
