I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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