Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Randomize
